Diablo 4 players finally unlocked the game’s secret cow level earlier this week, but that has only led to an all-new, even more ridiculous quest–the search for cow god.
It was just a few days ago that the secret portal to Diablo 4’s cow level was revealed, the grand conclusion to a years-long secret-hunting saga within Blizzard’s ARPG. Within the secret cow level waited The Cow King, a new boss that upon defeat rewards not only the wackiest item in Diablo history, but also multiple instances of a rare quest item, Prime Rib.
As is usually the case, the key to these secret quests is always in the flavor text, and the flavor text for both of these items are leading players to believe Diablo 4’s cow-themed shenanigans are just heating up.
Below a wall of the most ridiculous item affixes in Diablo history, the flavor text for The Cow King’s Crown refers to the boss as the “hoof of Moophisto,” implying that the king serves some higher, bovine power. As for the Prime Rib, it’s described as a “royal cut of beef, with perfect marbling, a majestic texture, and a regal flavor.” The item description continues, “Such a prime cut would be a worthy offering to anyone, even to a god.”
With reference to a god and an entity known as Moophisto, it seems clear there is still some divine cow being out there for players to discover. As detailed by Diablo content creators like LoatheBurger, secret hunters are already on the case and have a few theories, the most prominent being the Prime Rib needs to be “offered” as fishing bait to summon the god of cows, whether that be Moophisto or some other being entirely.
Fishing does appear to play a key role in this. The activity was added in the new expansion, and allows players to catch all kinds of rare (and occasionally even legendary or Unique) fish. During a developer livestream ahead of Lord of Hatred’s release, multiple Blizzard devs could be seen wearing “sea cow” shirts. The same image of the part-fish, part-cow monster seen on the shirts even appears on Diablo 4’s in-game map off the coast of Lord of Hatred’s new region, Skovos.
Adding to the mystery is a bizarre infomercial released a few days after Lord of Hatred launch that features a fake “MeFISHto” product. The infomercial sports a hotline that, when called, does make reference to The Cow King, leading many to believe fishing and the cow god are indeed connected.
Whether or not the cow god can be summoned in this expansion is still to be determined. Accessing the cow level took years of convoluted quests that all led to temporary dead ends, only for more clues to be added in the next expansion or uses for secret quest items to be added later. That could certainly be the case with summoning the cow god as well, but players are on the hunt, and they won’t rest until the moojestic being is found.
While some Diablo 4 players hunt for the next steps in its cow quest, others are wondering where the game’s story will go next and whether the franchise’s namesake will soon make an appearance. Based on in-game lore, Diablo’s return could still be a while.